Looking Ahead

I'm supposed to wax poetic - or at least nostalgic - today of all days, right?

The thought occurred to me this afternoon that this is the first year in recent memory that I haven't been saying good riddance by the time 12/31 rolls around. 2004 had my car accident, 2005 had my subsequent back surgery and allll those months of physical therapy, in 2006 I was just ready for the new year so I could start my dossier, in 2007 I was eager to be another year closer to finally being matched with my child. If anyone had told me then that this year would bring what it did, I surely would not have believed it.

So here we are on the verge of closing out 2008 and I'm actually a little sad to see it go. 2009 will no doubt bring more wonderful adventures and amazing discoveries, but 2008 took me to the other side of the world and brought me back to a whole new life. 2008 was when something bigger than even my wildest dreams came true. 2008 was when WeiJ and I - WeiJ and all of us - became a family.

In the year ahead we'll be celebrating WeiJ's second birthday...his first at home. And appropriately enough, it falls on my first Mother's Day. There's a first haircut yet to be had, a first cake to be eaten, a first circus, a first petting zoo, a first real day at the pool. And I'm sure we'll celebrate finally being caught up on those pesky vaccinations! We'll enjoy our first spring together, our first summer together and maybe even our first trip since China. We'll spend plenty of time at the zoo and at Sea World, and log quite a few miles strolling the neighborhood. We'll be celebrating lots of "a year since"s and countless other milestones. 2008 was the beginning, but there are so many more firsts to be had! So even though tomorrow takes us another step away from the baby I met this fall, in 2009 I'll get to watch him continue to blossom into the wonderful little person he is becoming. Yes, BIG things ahead! :)

WeiJ and I wish you all a warm and wonderful 2009 and hope it brings you all much joy!

Quick Snippets

So I'm sitting here listening to my goofball son trying desperately to keep himself awake. The volume gets louder the more tired he gets - at this rate I'm assuming the house will fall silent here soon. He isn't crying, he isn't whining...just talking to himself very loudly. It gets quiet for a moment, followed by a burst of words in ever-increasing volume. I hear Mama about every 2 or 3 words, along with celery, bread (in his new deeeep South accent, it's sort of like braey-id), cereal, snowman, elbow, Elmo, and his usual rollcall of family. I can't wait until he's able to put words together and express full thoughts. Such a character!

WeiJ has broken out a new expression that I'll hopefully catch on film soon. I suspect it may be a mirror image of my "stern" look - yes, the one he's probably been seeing more often as we have more and more of those boundary testing days. It's so hard to keep from laughing to see those little brows furrow in his little disapproving "I mean it" way. I should be fully gray by the time he's 3. ;)

I got an email today reminding me to schedule my 6-month post placement visit with my social worker. I can't believe this week marks 4 months already! I know I've said it several times before, but it's odd how it can feel like so long ago and just yesterday all at once. You mean there was life before WeiJ??

Fsssssh!

Boy oh boy did this kiddo have a great day today!

ShuShu, Ayi and Uncle K came by to pick us up and take us to... Sea World! What better place for a boy fascinated by fish? After today, I'd say we'll be getting our money's worth out of this season pass! Our first show of the day was the sea lion/walrus show, and WeiJ stood on my lap with his eyes wide and finger pointing at the action. I'm not sure if he knew what to make of it all but he sure seemed to enjoy it. We stopped in at the penguin exhibit on our way to the Shamu show ... and by the time that one started, I could tell he was about to hit his limit of what he could process for one day. But then at the end of the show when Shamu jumps out of the water to touch the big ball hanging from the ceiling, WeiJ was asking for more! I was ready for that one to be over though - the theme of the show was Miracles and kept talking about the miracle of children in our lives. Like I needed to hear any of that to help push me over the edge these days? I'm not sure how much more of it I could have listened to. La-la-la, look at the whales, la-la-la. He was asleep by the time we got to the dolphin tank and the reef exhibit, but after he woke up he enjoyed those too. We got to lean over the wall to watch the dolphins in the pool, and even ended the day by being splashed. He was one happy camper all day and took about 5 minutes to fall fast asleep tonight. I can't wait for March when the park officially opens for the 2009 season. So much to see and do!

Once again, no photos yet. Maybe Monday...

Merry Christmas!

For days leading up to Christmas I've been on the verge of an outburst of a big ol' sloppy cry - just so many emotions and I can't quite sort them out or process them. It's the idea of where WeiJ and I each were in our lives this time a year ago, it's watching him study the ornaments on the tree and feeling awed that my path crossed with this child, it's the wonder of transformations, it's admiration for the strength of his spirit, it's the thought of all the children who still wait, it's the thought of the families who pine with crushingly empty spots in their hearts, and it's knowing that that was me last Christmas. I am so deeply grateful to know that WeiJ was being loved by his foster family and not alone this time last year. And now, this Christmas Eve, he was again surrounded by family ... forever family. The light that shines from this little one is magical. In such a short time he has captured so many hearts, and it sometimes overwhelms me to see it. He's not just accepted, he's thoroughly embraced. It makes my heart fuller than I know what to do with.

ShuShu and Ayi spent the night here last night so they could be here for the big Christmas morning moment. I think WeiJ was so taken with the fact that ShuShu, Ayi and GongGong were in the living room waiting for him that it took him a moment to notice the toys. Oh, but then he sure did notice! We flirted with that limit of sensory overload but I think this year we managed to have just the right amount of stimulation for him. He loved everything he got and was trying to figure out how to play with everything at once before settling on one thing at a time...well, when he wasn't combining pieces of one with another to see if they'd work. He ate a hearty breakfast - we all did! - and then after ShuShu and Ayi left, he nodded his head vigorously when I asked if he was ready for some books and a nap. You know he's really ready when he gets up to put his toys outside the bedroom and then closes the door behind him. Two books and five minutes later, he was sawing logs. :)

I don't have photos to upload at the moment, but never fear - they'll be up soon.

I can't imagine a better couple of days for him. Or for me. We're one lucky pair.
So from this lucky pair to all of you who visit the blog so faithfully, we wish you all a warm and happy Christmas!

How Genius is Genius?

I was picking up random alphabet magnets around the house (yes, apparently they're not only fun on the fridge, they're fun to carry around in your hands just because) and decided to move some of them up to the freezer door to minimize how many he can scatter at any given point in time. Since I'm a *bit* on the compulsive side when it comes to sorting -- hey, stop laughing -- there of course had to be a pattern or a method to the madness. I settled on moving the letters he knows cold up high to get an idea of how many he's still working on. Ha - the freezer pun was just a coincidence, honest.

The result? I knew he was good, but wow. Good grief - he's 19 months old and hadn't heard English until 15 months, let alone seeing letters in print. Someone's been paying attention to all those board books!

Just for fun, I added a poll on the right side of the blog. If you had to guess, how brilliant do you think he is? No monetary wagers, please. :)

Time Flies

Oops, did I really just let a week go by without a post? Everything's fine, just busy busy busy getting ready for next week. I have put off wrapping until now because there's no way the gifts would have stayed wrapped or decorated until Christmas. There have been a couple of ornament casualties but nowhere near as many as I thought there would be with a toddler and a mischievous kitty around. So far so good!

We've had a couple of what I call "two year old" days lately and the new word of the week getting *lots* of play is no. It's still cute how he says it though - almost like a sweet little new. I'm sure that cuteness will wear off any day now. ;)

With Ayi's break from school, Wei J has been enjoying lots of extra ShuShu and Ayi time. Unfortunately the weather has kept us all indoors for the most part, but he has enjoyed it nonetheless. He even got to make his first batch of sugar cookies with Ayi on Thursday and instantly took to pressing the cutouts and transferring the cookies to the sheet. And what are sugar cookies without sprinkles? He was a little too enthusiastic with that part, but thankfully did allow me to help him shake the bottle after the initial explosion of red crystals across the tray and counter. All this of course led to his newest word, cookie. At least he said celery and carrot first - that makes me feel a little better.

The first thing WeiJ wants in the morning is na - time for me to plug in the tree lights! And then after they're on, he smiles really big and says a very satisfied naaaaa. :) We took him in the car to check out some other neighborhoods and had a nice chorus of naaaaaa....naaaaa...with a few exclamations for snowmen or Santas mixed in. Yes, he's clearly a fan of holiday decorations!

And in non-WeiJ news, this week for the first time in 20+ years I found out my eyes had improved since the last visit! Or maybe it is WeiJ related after all -- could it be all those carrots I'm eating now since he loves them so much? Maybe the myth is actually true after all. Who knew he'd change the way I see the world...both figuratively *and* literally! :)

Photo Overload

Well last Saturday was so much fun and provided such great photos (said ever so humbly, honestly!) that I decided to try another photo session today. Besides, it was *ahem* suggested that the bulky layers of clothes may have added a few pounds to WeiJ's appearance so I felt compelled to let him show his properly proportioned build. :)

Ornaments seem to have a prominent symbolic role this year. I love this photo - WeiJ reaching out to an ornament that LaoLao bought from the Tianjin orphanage, handcrafted by the kids as part of their annual fundraiser. We have three hanging on the tree, and each time I see one it's a little bittersweet. I can't help but think of all those sweet faces so proud to show off their work...and in my heart hoping that they'll all find families of their own to cherish them.

I wanted to buy a special ornament this year to commemorate our first year together. Could it get more perfect than this Willow Tree, called Angel's Embrace? The tagline that goes along with it is "Hold close that which you hold dear."
OK I promise that's the last of the sentimental sap for today. Here are a few of my favorite shots from today....

And no, our beebo obsession hasn't quite faded yet...
By the end of the session, it was pretty clear that WeiJ thought he was looking pretty good. Here's Mr. GQ Smooth working his modeling repertoire:

*sigh* Is that a handsome kid or what?? Love that outfit too - it's like a glimpse of FutureWeiJ. He looks so grown up!

Happy 19 Months, WeiJ!

Here it is - WeiJ's 18th month in pictures! slideshow

And then there were 57

So tomorrow my little guy turns 19 months, making him closer to two than one. With a vocabulary of 57 words, a big strong body and the sweetest little heart, he is miles from the little boy we first met just 3 months ago. It is clearer than ever that he is feeling secure with his place in our family. I see it in the expressions on his face, the joyful spring in his step, his interactions with others, and now I see it in the ease with which he now goes to sleep. It is no longer a battle of wills at naptime and I think it has everything to do with his confidence that everything will be just the same when he wakes up. His clinging has lost its subtle subconscious anxiety and he now holds on because he wants to, not because he feels he has to. Granted, he was remarkably well adjusted from Day 1...but with every day that passes he just seems to shine brighter and brighter.

Sharing My Joy

I'm not sure mornings get any better than this...

'Tis the Season

I am SO in the Christmas spirit, complete with Charlie Brown music streaming in a loop in my head. After a week of walking around the neighborhood to look for decorated houses, I decided it was time to stop being a loser house with no lights up. So Wednesday night after dinner we headed to the store to pick up some lights and see if we could find a decent tree. I have an artificial one, but I want WeiJ's first Christmas to be magical and there's just something special about having a real tree. It didn't dawn on me until I went to get one that it's been YEARS since I've had one! Anyway, we were too late on Wednesday to get one but I got some lights so I was able to get started on the front yard on Thursday after work. I got to spend a good productive hour outside, thanks to a neighbor boy who dropped by to ask about - and then play with - Wei J. And then Thursday evening, GongGong bought us WeiJ's first Christmas tree! Yay!

I strung the lights as soon as we got home. I turned off most of the other lights in the house before I plugged them in so WeiJ could get the full effect...and between the big smile, wide eyes, and the "mmmmmm" sound he made, he was properly dazzled. :) We spent about an hour decorating the tree together. I thought he was content just going through a box of ornaments and pulling out the ones that interested him, but then I saw the section of the tree where he was laying his chosen treasures on the branches. Yes, lots of tears welled up at that. Just like when he gave me that sweet, casual "byebye, Mama" like he'd been saying it forever, here he was putting little decorations on a tree inside the house like it was something natural and expected, something we've done for years. All I could do was shake my head and then give him a great big squeeze. After we were finished, I turned off the rest of the house lights and we sat on the floor with him in my lap to admire our beautiful tree. I'm still overwhelmed that I'm actually living these moments.

All is well

I was right - Wei J DID pack on weight! When the doctor plotted his new measurements, she said something along the lines of "now THAT's a growth chart!" and that I must be feeding him well. He apparently didn't grow any taller since the last visit a month ago...but this nurse wasn't as careful at measuring and re-measuring like the one we had for the last two visits. It seems this past month he has put his energy into growing out instead of up...and I suspect a good bit of it has to do with muscle gain in those legs. He's up TWO pounds to 28 pounds, 8 ounces - but once again, this nurse did things differently so this was fully dressed instead of in his birthday suit like last time. I guess I'll have to break down and start measuring him at home. Yes Ayi, the data collection inconsistency drives me bananas. :) At any rate, it looks like his numbers still put him at 90% for height and 75% for weight. He's a solid, strong and healthy boy and the doctor said he looks great!

Weekend Catchup

Today was (another) one of those days when I've kicked myself all day for missing a photo op. This afternoon I took WeiJ outside with me so I could get the trash and recycling all set for tomorrow. This boy *loves* being outside - day or night, hot or cold...and yes, probably rainy or dry if I gave him that option! I finished my trash duty and then told WeiJ it was time to go inside and get something to eat. He came willingly until it was time to set foot through the door - that's when the tantrum started. So this is the photo op I missed: my little guy in his jeans and long-sleeved onesie that says "100% Boy"... standing there in his little defiant posture with both thumbs hooked on his belt loops, head thrown back and a completely melted face in an all-out tantrum cry. Yeah, 100% boy. :)

Oh, but does he ever make me smile! This weekend we spent a good amount of time outside - with WeiJ leading the way and setting the pace. That could mean running down the sidewalk, planting himself on the grass to examine leaves, running back and forth over a particularly fun/bumpy/uneven/textured section of the sidewalk... or for brief moments, actually holding my hand. I get a kick out of watching him stop and close his eyes to feel the wind in his hair...then stand there and wait for the wind to blow again (while he gestures at me for more like I can make that happen!). We listened to the sound of flags whipping in the wind, and even got to watch a kite flying around the corner.

On Saturday morning he walked almost the entire way to the park and back - I think it's about a third of a mile. And yes, that's almost to the park and not almost all the way back...we got distracted! It's as if his inner monologue was something along the lines of treebirddogtreeleavesbird...running... treeflowerdogtruck... running...truck... treedoorlonghornflagtreeflower... hey wait.... He did a 180 and came running back up the sidewalk to study a flag with the Longhorn logo on it and was excitedly pointing it out and saying his word for Longhorn. (Yes, he actually has a word for the logo and points it out every time he sees it!) After all that he just kept going that direction and I just followed. Who needs to stop at the swings when you have so much more to discover? Fun things like dragging the string of a balloon around the house for the kitty, or accidentally whistling when you inhale, or chasing bubbles on the front lawn... yep, he had a terribly boring weekend. ;)

We go to the doctor again on Wednesday - not for an exam, just shots. I should be able to get updated height and weight though. And whatever pound threshhold he just crossed feels like a big one. Either I suddenly got weaker overnight, or he became more solid! Must be all that running around, packing on muscle. Seriously, that lumberjack comment last week might just fit!

My little prize fighter in training - check out those paws!

Thanksgiving, In Short(s)

I was a little out of sorts yesterday, preoccupied with the symbolism of the day as well as trying to figure out how to get each dish prepared and ready and hopefully put together a decent first Thanksgiving meal. I'll blame the weather for throwing me off a little too. This time last year, we were bundled up in jackets, gloves and scarves. It just doesn't feel like the holidays when you're dressed in t-shirts and shorts because it's 80 degrees out! I was so preoccupied that I completely forgot to get any pictures of the big day!!

I didn't have time for a pretty table, but I can get over that. :) I did get to break out my new set of silk placemats from China though - seemed like the perfect special occasion to do that. The table was overflowing with food and we ate so much that we didn't even touch the two beautiful pies...or the honeybaked ham! We had smoked turkey, mashed potatoes, honey dijon glazed baby carrots, cherry almond salad with bleu cheese crumbles, apple raisin walnut dressing, sweet potatoes, cranberry sauce and yeast rolls. I'm stuffed again, just thinking about it all!

What did WeiJ think of his first Thanksgiving dinner? I'm sure he thought it was just a new and improved version of Wednesday night dinner, with a slightly larger audience. He definitely had that charm meter dialed up to high!

Giving Thanks

So much to be thankful for, so little time....

I only teared up a couple of times today, during random moments that struck me as reminders of how different life is this year. Watching the parade, I had a flash of WeiJ's giddy excitement in years to come as he gets old enough to understand what he's seeing. Then as I was chopping onions and celery, WeiJ was entertaining himself by bumping up against the backs of my legs and bouncing off. Things definitely went slower with him underfoot, but hearing the pure joy in that laugh is priceless. And then tonight I looked around the table it was hard not to think of family lost and family gained. Yes, life is definitely different this year...but I'm grateful for every new tradition we're about to create - with WeiJ at the center of it all. He is surrounded by love, and for that I am awed and grateful.

With my whole heart I'm thankful to be this little guy's mama. I am blessed, blessed, blessed that my brilliant, charming, precious, sweet little boy found his way home this year.

Some Random Catch Up

Is there any better way to wake up than to a cold slobbery kiss from a precious smiling little guy? :) It was so sweet it took the sting out of it being waaaay too early in the morning! Two mornings in a row, too. I could handle that becoming a pattern!

WeiJ watched part of Finding Nemo on Saturday. He sat for about 25 minutes of it before he was ready to move on to something else, but for now that's probably a pretty good stretch. Of course a good part of those 25 minutes were filled with kicking legs, pointed fingers and declarations of, "fssh! fsssh! fssh! FSSH!!"

WeiJ has been intrigued by sounds for the last week or so. He has experimented with putting his ear to the water in the tub, covering his ears with his hands to discover the difference in sounds, and pointing out to me everything he hears from the dog or cat to the wind or kids playing outside. Sunday morning he was pointing to his ear during breakfast but I couldn't figure out what he was trying to tell me he was hearing. Then this little genius did his music hands...I asked if he wanted to hear some music and his face lit up in a giant grin, so excited that I got what he was trying to tell me.

He is still eating a staggering amount - last night I think I went back to the soup pot 4 times at the request of "more." He may have eaten his weight in celery, carrots, cabbage and chicken. And no, until I named them off for him I didn't realize that all his favorites started with a C! And then after all that, he asked for yogurt and drank down half of the bottle. I thought I might have found the bottom of that pit...but no, it was just time for animal crackers. Yikes!

WeiJ's First Public Appearance

Oh, this boy is eating everything in sight. And sleeping for nice looong naps. Should I take a poll on how much he'll have grown in the month between doctor visits? His feet are visibly different too - not just longer, but broader and a little less like Fred Flintstone. They have lost some of that pudgy-baby-feet look and now offer a preview of the big strong feet it appears they'll become. I sure wasn't expecting a kiddo with the hands and feet of a lumberjack!

WeiJ had his first public outing tonight with a crowd. We went to our agency's Waiting Family dinner to introduce him to my social worker and some of the other local families who have adopted with this agency or are in the process of doing so. I was a little concerned because he missed his late afternoon nap, but he ended up doing GREAT. There was a 3 1/2 year old girl who was pretty taken with him and was very much in his face...I held my breath for a second but it didn't take long for him to appear fascinated with her too. He didn't seem to mind her climbing all over his highchair or touching him and was interacting nicely. I put him down on the ground so he could play with the kids and she immediately took both of his hands and they were spinning around, ring-around-the-rosie style. He had a huge grin on his face...until BAM they both fell. Oops. He was content to sit on my lap after that! He behaved so well and ate a ton (again) without making much of a mess. After his brief attempt at playing he was really good about just sitting on my lap while people came up to talk and didn't fuss. It was nice to have a chance to talk to people who were still in the paperchase stage and let them see what a little treasure WeiJ is, and maybe help open their hearts and minds a little more and consider the possibility of applying for a Waiting Child. The highlight of the evening for me was hearing that one family who was sitting on the fence a bit was pushed over the edge by seeing WeiJ and talking to us. Of course - how could you meet WeiJ and not be enamored? :)

Leaps and Bounds

My brain was jolted out of its work-mode focus this morning by the sweetest little voice saying "byebye, mama" as he was being wheeled out the door for a walk this morning. It took me a second to replay it in my head - did I really just hear that? It was his first 2-work combination since he asked for "more book" several weeks back...but mostly it was the way he said it, like he'd been saying it every day forever.

It's startling to see how much can change with WeiJ in a week. He is LOVING spending so much time with ShuShu, especially outside. Could all that sunshine be making him grow even more? He just looked so big to me today, and his feet look giant! Besides all the fun adventures outside, I think he likes having someone else around as an audience to show off all his new words. It was just a few days ago that I mentioned his vocabulary was nearing 40 -- well, better make that closing in on 50 already! And in what could be the biggest unexpected and sudden change ... WeiJ fell asleep in bed by himself twice today! I laid down with him like always and read him his usual books...and after 10 or 20 minutes of trying to settle down his silly antics that he pulls trying to stay awake, I got up and told him I'd be back and he needed to go to sleep. And holy cow, both times he did! This would be such huge progress if it's not just a fluke. But twice in one day and three times within the last week? I'm almost hopeful! Last week he was a little off kilter with the change in routine, but now I think something may have clicked. Maybe he's getting the idea that if he goes to sleep or leaves the house, when he comes back I'm always here waiting. Yes, maybe two or three times on his own isn't enough to consider a pattern, but I'd like to think it's a sign that he's reaching a new level of security. I suppose time will tell, one way or another. Aw, my little guy is growing up!

A First I'd Rather Forget

I know it was only a matter of time, but I think I've officially caught Wei J's first bug. He was whimpery and whiny on Sunday and Monday and just wasn't himself. It was umm - fairly obvious - that he had some kind of tummy thing going on but other than that seemed to have no symptoms besides being cranky and needy.

Well as of today, boy do I ever understand! All I want to do is whimper and curl up in a ball too.

But for a little levity...even as bad as I feel, I still got a good laugh from my little man today. Lately I've seen him do a silly squatty walk where he bends his knees but keeps the rest of his body straight. I thought he was just being a nut...until it hit me like a lightning bolt that oh my goodness that's ME he's imitating! Yes, that's my ohhh-my-back-is-stiff walk that tends to follow a stint of sitting on the floor or hovering over the edge of the tub. Little turkey. ;)

A Perfectly Peaceful Day

I love this time of year, especially days like today. The first real crisp air always puts a smile on my face, and it looks like WeiJ is the same way. I opened the door for our walk this morning, and when the air hit him he let out a chuckle. :) He ran and squealed the whole way, delighting in every breeze and every opportunity to wave at his shadow. Now that's the way to live life!

We spent a good part of the afternoon outside, taking advantage of the perfect temperatures and sunny skies. I swept leaves and even cleaned the windows on the outside while WeiJ played with acorns and watched the dog run crazy circles with his own giddy excitement. I think the dog was as surprised as I was when WeiJ took over the game of fetch! He stood next to me while I cleaned, scooped up the ball each time the dog brought it back and then chunked it as best as he could. I have to say it was pretty cool to watch this giant of a dog hunkering down in the grass waiting for this little man's direction. I think Cesar Millan would have approved!


Between the fun outside and the three hour nap, he had a great day. Yes, I did say a three hour nap! He slept for two hours (right during game time, yay!) and then woke up a little cranky so I cuddled him on my lap in front of the tv. He fell back asleep and slept snuggled on me for another hour. My arm was going numb but I didn't care! It reminded me of our time in China and I was just eating it up. :) He was in such a good mood after that - who wouldn't be? At dinner, he was in hysterical giggle fits. Those giggles are addicting! It was a loud and silly dinner, and he was filled with so much joy over it that as I was cleaning up his tray he looked at me with his smiling face and sparkly eyes and made his kissy sound. Mmmm, spaghetti face kisses.... :)

That crazy nap threw off his schedule for the day - so 10 minutes into our walk tonight, I noticed his head was already slumped over and he was out cold. So he's in bed now, fully dressed in his fleece jacket and sweater hat. I won't have to worry about him being chilled tonight, that's for sure!

Really, it was just an ordinary day. But I'll take this kind of ordinary any day!

First Week Finished!

Every night this week, I have fallen asleep when I put WeiJ to bed...which means I've missed my nightly computer time. I will try to keep these updates as close to daily as I can, but I'm sure there will be some gaps as I try to settle into our new routine.

Since Wednesday night, WeiJ's been showing off a skill...his Mowgli walk - on all fours with straight legs, he reminds me of a scene from the Jungle Book. My surprised laughter was again all the encouragement he needed to file this one away as something to break out again for a repeat performance. Such a silly boy! His block stacking obsession is still going strong - we're still at 8 blocks before they fall, but he's getting much more adept at placing them lightly. He's also getting much more adept and making my buildings come down with a crash before I realize he was even making demolition plans. His verbal vocabulary continues to swell (to almost 40), as does his letter recognition. I really didn't think it would be this early that I'd have to start spelling things in front of him...and I wonder how long that will last before he's figuring that out too! He's having a great time hanging out with his ShuShu (no surprise there) and has taken his first short trips away from the house without me. I admit I'm a little envious of all the fun he's having while I'm working, but really am so grateful that he's getting this great opportunity. It takes a village...and we're so lucky that his "village" embraces him the way they do.

Yesterday during WeiJ's late nap I sat here at the computer with tears flowing as I read through the profiles of children in Beijing. Each child had a brief video clip posted as well, which just brought them to life and made them so much more than words on paper. These children were between the ages of 8 and 13 and my heart just broke for them. What if WeiJ and I hadn't been so lucky to find each other so soon? It tears me up to know these kids - and so many thousands like them - still wait for families to call their own. They immediately brought back the little faces and sparkling eyes of the children we visited in WeiJ's orphanage, and my heart was once again gripped by the bittersweet combination of ache and hope. In the videos, one particular girl's sobs during her recital of a poem was just crushing...I so hope her family finds her soon and that emptiness can be healed. There just has to be more that I can do - and if I keep chewing on it, hopefully I'll come up with an answer. I thought of my silly little guy's blossoming world and how lucky we are to have found each other. I thought of his laugh and squeals and kisses...and then shuddered at the thought of what if he had been one of these children left behind. In the pre-WeiJ days I used to watch the lists and celebrated a little extra when certain children became unavailable, because that meant their happy ending was on its way. Now that we've been to China and looked these children in the eyes, I feel them tugging on my heart all that much more. Fortunately my time on the computer was cut short by the end of naptime. You can bet that one particular little guy was smothered in hugs and sloppy smooches. Although there has to be more I can do, there's absolutely nothing more I could hope or ask for in this new life with this new extraordinary gift.

My Little Gymnast

Just a week after accomplishing a hop with both feet, WeiJ has moved on to his next feat: the somersault. He's been doing the stance for a few weeks - both hands and his head pressed on the ground, but not really going anywhere. Today he was doing that at naptime (when he busies himself with everything he can think of to avoid falling asleep) and voila...over he went! It wasn't quite a straight line, more like... well, a capital Y without the top left part. (I had another mathematical explanation but I'll let my nerd flag fly another day!) He was so stunned and bounced up with a yell of such surprised excitement that it was impossible not to laugh. That of course was taken as the equivalent of asking for more - so over and over, back and forth he did his little crooked somersaults, laughing and squealing the whole time. He got carried away and tried to do two in a row...yep, right off the bed. I almost caught him but only managed to slow his fall a little. Fortunately I already knew he has a penchant for somehow slipping off the end of the bed so the floor is well padded there now. That didn't scare him off though - he managed to sneak in one more before finally laying down to go to sleep.

So - he has the running and hopping down, he likes to hang on the rings at the park, and now add tumbling to the mix. That covers vault, rings, and floor exercise. Are parallel bars next for my little all-around gymnast, or will it be pommel horse?? ;)

He's 1 1/2 Today!

WeiJ turned a whopping 18 months old today! He had a great day, too - he laughed when he saw ShuShu come in the door this morning and was a perpetual motion machine the rest of the day. Well, with the exception of the walks - the stroller lulled him into a couple of short naps. He's now on his third nap of the day! As an added bonus, Ayi came by for the second half of the day so he really had a fun time today. Meanwhile...my big back-to-work day didn't quite go as expected. I ran into some network connection issues and wasn't able to do much of anything. Tomorrow's a holiday for us so hopefully Wednesday I'll be back up and running.

I just finished the slideshow for WeiJ's 17th month. It comes as a shock to the brain to look back at the beginning pictures from September and see how much he's changed and how far he's come. It takes a while to sort through the mountains of photos, but I love doing these! I'll post it in the sidebar later...for now, click here to view: slideshow

Playing Catch Up

I've spent the last few days trying to squeeze in as much fun for WeiJ (and me!) as possible since I'm headed back to work on Monday. By the time I get him asleep and my usual nightly chores done, I've just been too tired to think of anything to write. So here's a quick recap of the last few days...

We hit the park on Friday, and this time WeiJ wanted nothing to do with the big slide. He was more than happy to go down the regular one over and over and over though! While we were there, the marching band started up again and he did his famous backside pat to the beat. I'm sure he thinks that park will always have that music now and will be looking for it next time! A confession: I bribed my child with food for the first time. I was ready to go and wanted to beat traffic, so I asked if he wanted french fries. Guess who came running back down the trail with a big smile and ready to go?

We did the zoo again on Saturday. What a difference in crowd compared to a Friday afternoon - we actually had to share the place! It was nice to be able to go right in without waiting in line though. That Members Only entrance is a nice benefit. He loved feeding the fish of course, and was happy to sit in his new stroller and take everything in. I may have some photos to share later - ShuShu was clicking away but I forgot to ask him to copy those photos onto this computer.

WeiJ is napping more this week. It can still be hard to get him to actually fall asleep of course, but once he's out he's been mixing in some 2 hour naps again. Getting ready to do some more growing, maybe? I got him some 18-24 month clothes for the winter and they just look so giant coming out of the box. Crazy that in just a couple of months we've gone from 6-12 month outfits fitting ok to needing 18-24s!

Once again, I have to say that Ergo saved the day. This whole time we've been home I've just been sweeping because I thought the vacuum might be overwhelming for him. Sure enough, he melted down for a bit the other day and had to have his hand held for the whole time. Today I decided to try carrying him on my back in the Ergo to make things a little less traumatic - and faster - and he settled right in there. Of course when he first saw it, he was giddily chanting "byebye!" When it's been 2 months since you've carried around 25 pounds strapped to your body, carrying 27 pounds on your back while you vacuum the house gets fatiguing in a hurry!

WeiJ has been pointing to my bottle of water and saying "O", which I at first I heard as eau and was starting to wonder how he possibly could have heard that word. It finally dawned on me that he was identifying the O in the Ozarka label. He's not actually trilingual....though for a second there I was ready to believe it. :)

Well after 70 days with WeiJ as my only focus, I am back to work in just about 10 more hours. I'm fortunate and grateful to have had this time with him and know it was the best thing I could have ever done for him. It's been wonderful for bonding and I'm so lucky to work for a company that offers us this opportunity. This time together has given us the best possible start to our new life and I'll miss our little bubble where we're our own little world.

Back to Reality

So...as of tomorrow it's back to reality for me. Well, not really back because it's a *new* reality - but my adoption leave is over and it's time to rejoin the land of grownups. Hopefully I won't break into rhyme during meetings or be caught humming whichever of WeiJ's songs happens to be stuck in my head at the moment! I had been weighing the options for what to do with WeiJ during the day, and I just don't think he's ready for a day care situation yet. He has come so far in the last couple of months, and I don't want to do anything to set him back with his confidence and sense of security. It's only been a couple of weeks now where he'll let me be in another room for a few minutes without anxiety - being apart all day is more than he could comfortably handle. He would probably cope and adapt, but I don't think that's the best move for his longterm attachment. So it was a pretty easy decision to hold off on daycare - even if he is a Doogie Howser in the making, school can wait a few months at least. A manny, that's the way to go.

So how to find a manny I can trust, that WeiJ trusts and likes, who I know is good with kids of all ages? One that knows WeiJ's story and understands the issues we may deal with and be consistent with his structure and behavior? Someone who would relish and celebrate every milestone as much as I would? And certified to teach, so we can keep that brain of WeiJ's occupied and stimulated? Yeah, that's a tall order alright. How lucky are we that I found exactly that, and he starts tomorrow morning? His name is SHUSHU!! :) I may have a hard time keeping Teddy Grahams and Cheezits in the house now...but it's the perfect fit, and I know WeiJ's going to be as thrilled as his ShuShu to get to spend that much time together. And since I won't be constantly worrying about him being safe and happy during the day, it will give me peace of mind and help me get my work done. So here's yet another piece of the puzzle falling into place at just the right time for WeiJ...one might almost think this was orchestrated.

Ladies and Gentlemen, We Have Liftoff!

Wei J has been trying and trying and trying some more to jump up off the ground for almost the whole time he's been home. He managed a fraction of an inch once, weeks ago...well, really a fraction of a fraction, and then he fell down. Every day I've seen him running around, on the tips of his toes and repeatedly throwing his chest up and hoping to defy gravity. Last week I noticed he almost had a skipping motion going - he was springing up pretty well on one side or the other but still not able to do an actual jump. Such determination!

Well -- tonight, he finally did it. His face looked stunned...either by the sensation of finally sticking the landing, or my enthusiastic squeal and applause! ;) Maybe it was that 2 1/2 hour nap that gave him the extra boost he needed, who knows. But over and over this evening, he practiced those cute little hops of his...and over and over we cheered his accomplishment. I'm so glad I got to see the moment he finally achieved what he'd been trying so hard to do!

I wonder what he'll set his mind to next?

WeiJ Loves Wednesdays

Wei J sure likes his audience on Wednesday evenings! He was a rowdy one tonight, jabbering away and running and spinning and just generally showing off. There was a *lot* of laughing coming out of that little guy tonight. Between the blocks and the tent and tunnel and the music and shadow hands, Wei J was a maniac and didn't want to stop to eat dinner!

For some reason - maybe it's because it's sinking in that November is actually here - the topic of the holidays came up a few times tonight. It's hard to believe that this year I get to celebrate with Wei J actually home. No more wistful daydreaming about someday, when my child is home...this year it's all finally for real. No more wouldn't it be fun to... or I can't wait to.... This year I get to watch my amazing kiddo experience the holiday season for the first time. Fair warning - I may start crying now and not stop until New Year's!

Inconspicuous Family

During the adoption wait, I saw a lot of emphasis placed on families preparing themselves to be a "conspicuous family" after adoption. I took training courses and read books so that I could start getting ready to respond to questions we might face down the line. I heard so many stories about babies drawing huge crowds of curious onlookers in China and wondered how I would handle that spotlight. None of that happened with us, really. Not in China, and not at home. It could be that I just don't notice the attention - maybe it's just not overt enough. Or maybe he's just so devastatingly adorable, they don't even notice me! Today as I was shopping in the produce section, with WeiJ happily bonking his new balloon on his head, it struck me how much we just blended in and I must look just like any of these other moms out for an afternoon of shopping with her toddler. He gets the "he's so cute" comments of course, but I don't notice anyone trying to figure us out. Maybe we'll stand out more as he gets older -- who knows. For now, I have to admit it's kind of nice to think that we (he) won't have to constantly be explaining things to nosy nellies. It will be up to WeiJ how much of his story he wants to share with people. Until then we can just be another inconspicuous family, and that's fine by me.

Oh, and about that balloon at the store - the greeter at the door was a nice older man who chased us down in the produce department to give WeiJ a balloon with a sucker attached as a weight. So nice! I thought I'd have to make a mad dash through the store but that balloon kept him entertained virtually the whole time...a life saver! While we were waiting to check out, I saw him flailing his legs and doing crazy motions with his hands. I turned around to see what he was seeing behind me -- a woman with a half dozen balloons! I thought he was going to lose his mind, he was so excited. I looked at his hands again and realized he was doing his "twinkle twinkle" motions so I looked at the balloons again. Sure enough, on that top balloon there were a few little stars in the design. I wonder what other things he always notices and wished he had a word or a sign for?

I'm starting to wonder if he doesn't have some sort of photographic memory or something. Today on the way to the store, we passed by the ice cream place we stopped at a couple weeks ago after his doctor's appointment. We went once. Remember that flailing over the balloons in the checkout line? Same thing when we passed that store! Then when we stopped at Blockbuster, he pointed at the Indiana Jones poster and then pointed to his own head to get me to notice the hat in the picture. A few minutes later I walked past the shelf with that movie and WeiJ is frantically leaning out of my arms and pointing at the movie, his head, and back at the movie. Maybe that's what he wanted to be for Halloween and I just missed it?!?

Then there are two things I'm chalking up to coincidence today because they just can't have really been anything more that coincidence. Just can't be. First one was when we pulled into the Blockbuster parking lot, I could almost swear he said his word for block. Nahhhh, no way. Then the second one was when we were stacking blocks on the floor. I was counting them out loud as he stacked them - the doctor asked if he could do 3 or more, so I was curious how far he'd get - and after he did his 5th, he was putting on the next one and said ssssss. SURELY he is not counting!! If he keeps this up, we're going to be conspicuous all right. Just for a very different reason!

30 words

I know, I missed another day! It's surprising how much of the day is lost to just chasing and tickling that giggling, squealing boy until he gurgles with contentment. Yeah, there's probably not much I wouldn't do just to hear that laugh of his. :)

I started a list a couple of weeks ago of WeiJ's verbal words because I thought the doctor might ask if we'd reached a certain level. I've been adding to it as I notice new words, and this weekend he hit THIRTY. Within the span of about a week, he's added bird (bir), blocks (bah), fire truck (ok so that one's growly and sounds a lot like his version of cracker, but he's trying!), ginger and belly button (behbuh). I think we might be able to add pear to the list - he kept trying to say it as he devoured just about a whole one!

Oh, and call me crazy...but I think he's already recognizing letters. It started with the letter 'O.' I'll be keeping an eye on that but he pointed to the O on my shirt and made his mouth in the shape of an O (without saying the letter). When I asked him if he had an O on his shirt, he pointed right next to the O in moose. Coincidence? Maybe. But *two* letters? That's too hard to ignore. I just asked him where's the H? and he turned to look at the refrigerator. I asked again, and he ran over to the fridge and reached up to grab the magnet for...the letter H!! I thought it might be too early to work on the alphabet but I guess not! His brain is obviously up for it. And mine is spinning.

Two Months

Today marks two months as a family! In those two months his progress has been exponential - besides a couple of pounds, a couple of inches, a couple new teeth and a couple dozen words in his English vocabulary, the biggest change is he has gone from baby to toddler. A toddler with a mind as hungry as his little belly, a toddler with his own opinions and personality. A toddler who accepts me as his mama and gives his affection right back. Today I heard him making kissy sounds at the photo book I sent to China. Usually that's his cue to me to "read" the book so I can kiss on and fuss over the photos of him. But when I turned around, he was kissing my photo. *sniff*

We had a musical afternoon today - it seems he enjoys jazz so I shuffled through my itunes library to find some. Cleaning the kitchen is so much nicer when I get to watch him spinning around and doing his "music hands" to Billie Holiday, Miles Davis and Wynton Marsalis! He also bounced on his toes to Rihanna and some of my 80s music too, but it seems that jazz grabs his attention even during commercials or cartoons. He's a cultured dude, this one. :)

Today I've had the Rascal Flatts song "The Day Before You" running through my head. Out of thousands of choices it happened to be one of the songs that came on during the random shuffle of songs...and it was perfect for today. I had to fight hard not to let him see me cry!

In your eyes I see forever

It makes me wish that my life never knew the day before you

But Heaven knows those years without you

Were shaping my heart for the day that I found you

If you're the reason for all that I've been through

Then I'm thankful for the day before you.

WeiJ Discovers the Zoo

Sorry about the lull in posting last week. First it was my back acting up, then it was a searing headache. Sitting down at the computer just wasn't in the cards. But Wei J's doing great and that's what matters!

We took our first trip to the zoo on Friday afternoon. He LOVED it, of course. It even prompted a new word for his verbal vocabulary: bird! I think he would have been happy with just the fish, ducks, birds and butterflies. But it was fun to watch his eyes soaking everything in and processing all that was going on around him. We only saw one monkey exhibit and he was enthralled by them chasing and swinging around. Actually I think that was the first thing we saw, so that must have done a number on his brain! He rode happily in the zoo rental stroller and just got up to look at each exhibit. As soon as I put him back in, he'd start saying more combined with the hand sign for extra emphasis. He was mesmerized by the hippos in the water and intrigued by the ability to see both below and above the water through the glass. I definitely need to get this boy to an aquarium! When we stopped at the crane habitat, one crane came walking right up to the fence to check Wei J out. Since cranes are considered good luck in China, I thought that was an extra special encounter. We fed some fish...and yes, he managed to sneak in a bite of fish food for himself. Bleh! We probably could have spent the whole day on that deck and he'd have had a great time. We also fed some goats at the petting zoo - maybe it's because we have a huge dog, but he didn't seem intimidated or scared of them at all. I think it's safe to say that this kiddo shares my affinity for animals. Yay!

Unfortunately, I didn't bring a camera so I don't have any photos to share of our afternoon. But I bought an annual pass so I'm sure we'll have AMPLE opportunities to make up for it!

Happy Halloween!

Up, up & awayyyyy...

On a lighter note

OK, enough mush. We now return to our regular scheduled programming...

With the weather change we've been spending more time outdoors - much to Wei J's delight of course. Today we toured parts of the neighborhood we haven't been to lately in a quest for the coolest Halloween decorations. No, I don't even have a pumpkin out front. Slacker mama, I know. Anyway, he kicked his legs and "EHH!"ed constantly to make sure I was aware of every pumpkin in the neighborhood. (Kind of like he announced "ball!" to pretty much each individual basketball, soccerball and football on the aisle at the store.)

This week Wei J has either just discovered or just taken a new interest in his shadow. It may take us forever to walk to the mailbox on the corner, but our trip just wouldn't be complete without stopping every few steps to wave and flutter our fingers! Today he was leaning over the side of the stroller to watch his shadow keeping us company. It was a little bit cute. :)

Wei J hasn't busted out with any new words in the last couple of days - that I know of. But lately I've noticed he is abandoning the sign language as a baby thing he doesn't need anymore as he expresses himself more verbally. I think the only time he uses it anymore is to reinforce what he is trying to say if I'm not catching on. Well, I think we're finished with the sign for finished or all done. Today at lunch, he said "more"...and then shook his head no. As in, no more! I asked if he was finished and he enthusiastically nodded his head. Good grief. Finished is too hard to say yet, but he came up with a different way to say it with the tools he already has. Amazing. Even more amazing is probably that he hasn't started saying No yet. The two's are coming though...I'm sure I'll hear it PLENTY and I'm in no hurry to start!

After bath tonight, I didn't want him walking around with a damp head with allll that hair he has now so I tried to see if he'd wear one of the little winter hats I bought ages ago. I call this series the O.G. in Panda PJ's. ;)

Not too sure what to think of it at first

Until I asked if it's the kind of hat his ShuShu wears.
Wearing his hats off to the side already, trying to give panda PJ's and a rocking horse hat a bit more edge. That's just how he rolls.

Six months ago

I was so caught up in the success of the pedi visit that I missed putting the dates together. It was six months ago last week that I sat in that same doctor's office, wrestling with the decision of whether or not to take the leap and submit my letter of intent to adopt Wei J. I can't believe six months can feel like a lifetime ago and just yesterday at the same time. I'll share some of what I journaled that day...but beware, it's a long one!

I’m still in a daze.

Thursday (4/17) at 3:02 I was working and couldn’t grab my cell but I saw I had a missed call from - hey that area code is Austin, I wonder if … and those first three digits look familiar, could it be my agency?? I frantically searched for and opened email from agency that I’d received earlier in the week … omg yes I think it might be them! Immediately dropped what I was doing, checked my voicemail and my heart skipped when I heard the message to please call them. My first thought was incredulous disbelief - omg could they have found a match for me???? No, that has to be too good to be true. I’ve been daydreaming about this day for so long, but couldn’t let myself believe it might actually be happening. Now. Today. I checked the two contact names for the Waiting Child program and sure enough, she was listed. Could this really finally be happening? I had sudden onset dyslexia and misdialed…told myself to calm down, and brace myself to hear something bland or irritatingly disappointing like just checking to see how you’re doing with the wait or it’s almost time to renew paperwork … took a deep breath and yep, misdialed again. Ack! Third time was a charm and I got through to the right extension. A few obligatory how are you’s, and then the words “I have this kiddo here on the list…”

My world spun.

I grabbed pen and paper because I knew the details would become fuzzy later with my mind racing like it was. His diagnosis didn’t fit any specific category (but she thought it was similar enough to some of the other needs I wrote that I’d be open to) so she wanted to see if I’d be interested in reviewing his file. A baby, less than a year old. I wrote down the bits that she told me, but this was something completely outside what I’d researched in the past so I was starting from Square One and didn’t have a clue whether or not this would be a possibility for me. I immediately started digging to see what the internet could provide as far as causes, treatments, related syndromes and prognosis. An hour of absorbing as much of the clinical aspect as I could, and I was starting to feel less terrified and leaning more towards maybe this might be a possibility. A few additional emails back and forth, and then I got his photo. My heart skipped another beat. And I couldn’t stop grinning every time I looked at the little guy’s grin and sweet face. The photo and growth report were several months old, but I felt encouraged that he didn’t seem to have any outward signs of the delays or additional symptoms that could potentially go along with his diagnosis. I threw myself into research all afternoon and all evening, and my ”gut feeling” seemed to teeter back and forth by the hour as I understood more of the possibilities, either scary or encouraging or just unknown.

My agency has requested more information for me but the process takes a little time to filter down from agency - CCAA - province - CWI and then back up the same channels. It would be fantastic to have updated photos and medicals and blood work but I knew I might need to be prepared to make this decision without it and hope for the best. I already had an opinion from one pediatric specialist on Friday, and Monday I started tracking down pediatricians and other related specialists. I sent his file for an IA specialist review, and on Tuesday was able to consult with her as well as a local pediatrician that I’m considering. Neither one of them were able to tell me much “new” from the limited information in his file - I had prepared myself to hear the worst, but neither one of them took that approach. They were just matter-of-fact and confirmed what I knew. Realistically there were too many unknowns to ever feel 100% comfortable. I'd be going in blind and mostly on faith - I just had to hope for the best and prepare for the worst.

Meanwhile his little grinning face was a fixture in the corner of my computer screen. I knew I shouldn’t get attached, and I needed to remain objective (even though I was already clearly smitten), but seeing him over there reminded me that this is a person’s future well-being at stake so he deserves every effort possible now in order to make the best decision that will impact the rest of his life one way or another. If I'm not the right family for him, I didn't want to be standing in the way of another who could be. No pressure. I have to give credit to my brother for shifting my perspective a bit when I was explaining my concerns about my ability to help this boy through the adjustments if it is in fact “worst case” for this diagnosis. He just reminded me that whatever the case may be, this child will be going through it anyway - that it’s this boy’s reality regardless of whether or not I choose to be the one to help him through it. The pediatrician said something similar - not all the cards are on the table and there is a lot unknown, but the part I do know is the cards *I* bring to the table in making a difference in this child’s life. She said it goes back to my motivation to adopt - and when I looked at the picture, was I looking at this child and asking if that’s a child I want to mother, or was I looking at this child as a mother and wondering how to best take care of him? I didn’t cry right then, but I did definitely tear up. It was as if a fog had lifted - the answer seemed so simple.

I don’t know if I can chalk these up to being “signs” but they are at least interesting coincidences. I could never explain what it was that triggered me to decide that it was time to stop just thinking about adopting and start applying to start the process, other than just feeling like that’s what I was supposed to do and when I was supposed to do it. As it turns out, this child was born just over 9 months after I requested the application packet from my agency. And he showed up on the list on the anniversary of the day my dossier arrived in China. I foolishly was convinced when I applied in ‘06 that I’d be traveling right around the Olympics. If things work out now, that timing could still in fact come true. He’s also from the northeastern part of China in an area I felt drawn towards all along. Of course these were not the reasons I said yes, but they just remind me that my feeling that my child was waiting for me in China was truer than I could have known at the time.

This whole process has been so emotionally draining. You reach a point where you have to steel yourself or you’ll let the wait drive you crazy. It’s hard to hope. It’s hard to feel joy. It’s hard to believe sometimes that it’s real and it’s going to happen. I looked at his photo and I wanted to, I really wanted to feel all of those things but I was afraid to let that happen because if I lost him or couldn’t say yes, I would only be adding to the burden my heart carries every day. Late Thursday night it struck me that today I may have seen my son for the first time. And I cried the tears of suppressed hope and a year and a half of love that’s been building without knowing its intended outlet. I am still afraid to hope and probably won’t feel safe to believe he’s real and he’s mine until I hold this precious little one in my arms.

So, six months ago I said yes, this is my son and the countdown started...and it's turned out far, far better than I ever dared to hope. Man, do I ever love this kid. :)

Gauka!

While I was cooking tonight, WeiJ was checking out the goodies in the pantry. I normally have the doors latched together - otherwise he'd be constantly bringing out items and leaving them in the middle of the kitchen floor. He was taking advantage of the opportunity tonight to see what was in there. Who knows, maybe that extra inch and a quarter lets him see up to the next shelf now! Anyway, I was working on a batch of chicken soup for us and was listening to him calling out the names of everything item by item. Ruhruh (cereal), ruhruh, ruhruh (yeah we always have a few kinds on hand!)...jsssss (juice)... gauka. I listened closer to try to figure out what he was trying for. And then he said gauka again, in a growly low voice. Since he said it twice I knew it wasn't an accidental babble - oh my gosh he was saying cracker! I turned around and sure enough, he was pointing to a box of Ritz. I made such a fuss over his new word (it seems like a harder word than his others and I *think* is the first one that isn't just the same syllable, doubled) that for the rest of the night, he was gleefully chanting "gauka, gauka" in that same silly growly voice. It's hard to tell who was more tickled by this new word, him or me!

He was full of new communicating tonight. I've been trying to get him to choose which books he wants me to read - partly a way to let him feel like he has some control, partly a way to try to get him to verbalize more. So tonight I asked him which book he wanted, and he pointed at his eye. Ahh, The Eye Book. After that one I asked again, and he touched my hand. I didn't get it, so he made the sign for apple. Ahhh, he wants "Hand, Hand, Fingers, Thumb" - I missed the cue about my hand, but caught that it has a page with an apple! Poor kid had to think outside the box to overcome my cluelessness...but I loved that he went on to a second attempt to be understood without skipping a beat or getting frustrated. Such a problem solver!

The squeakysqueaky of (not so) little feet

Thanks to a verrry kind family who just got home from China with their precious son, Wei J spent the day running around and dancing to hear the squeaking of his new pair of shoes. I knew I missed hearing that squeak - I just didn't realize how much until I heard it again. That sound is a little reminder of everything about our time in China...and apparently just plain fun for Wei J! His original pair lost a squeaker before we even left China, so I think he was extra excited to have both feet in the game this time. As an added bonus, the little character on the shoes is a mouse, his favorite new word lately. I couldn't even begin to count the number of times he came up to me today to announce that he had "mmmah" on his feet. So cute! Hearing the rapid-fire squeaks from this running and dancing toddler made me a little sentimental, remembering the irregular and unsteady squeaks in China as Wei J was gaining his balance and ability to steer. It's just another reminder of how much progress he's made in such a short amount of time and why last month seems like forever ago. So if September to October brought us from unsteady walking to running, I wonder what November has in store?

No wonder nothing fits!

It turns out my eyes weren't playing tricks on me - he DID sprout! In the last month he gained almost another pound... and grew another inch and a quarter! The nurse even measured his length twice to be sure it was really that much more. According to the CDC growth charts, his numbers put him at 95th percentile for height and halfway between 50th and 75th percentile for weight. I just looked at a Chinese growth chart and his weight and height are both off the top of that one! I liked how the pedi put it: with good nutrition, this is just his body catching up to where it was meant to be. There are so many parallels I can find with that, but I'm too sleepy to get too philosophical tonight. :) She seemed pleased with his verbal development and didn't bring up the need for Early Intervention services this time. She asked if he said at least 6 words...I told her I counted more than 20! I think we'll keep playing it by ear and see if that's something we should pursue down the line if he needs help verbalizing. He was a trooper with the shots and doesn't seem to be reacting as much as the last round. Last time he had a fever almost immediately and was feeling puny right away. Other than being tired tonight and a teensy bit clingy, he seems to be holding up much better. That's 'cause he's a big boy now. :)

Once again, I can't say enough how amazed and just extraordinarily lucky I feel to find my kiddo in such good health. My expectations were just so different and I was so concerned about reports that showed him being so tiny in China. But here he is, my tall, solidly built toddler with nothing but more exponential growth ahead of him.

Just a little photo fix

It was such a beautiful day today that Wei J and I were obligated to head over to the park. If only we had an actual season with this weather! We have another doctor's appointment tomorrow, so I wanted to make sure he got in a good day of fun today. I caught some great smiles on the swings...unfortunately I was playing with the camera settings so the photos didn't turn out well. I guess that means we'll just have to force ourselves to go back to the park for retakes! I did get a few good ones on the way, minus the giant yellow butterfly that kept flitting away at the last second. They were everywhere again today!

Let's stop to admire the pretty flowers on the way

Wei J knows it's important to take time to stop and smell the flowers

...and then rip out a handful of petals and offer them to Mama

A Dose of Reality

Wow, benefits enrollment didn't used to be this stressful! It's all done though, unless I change my mind (again) in the next hour. I know I am fortunate to have these options, but it's so hard to guess what kind of medical expenses we'll have in 2009 when I've only been doing this for less than two months! Choosing the plan wasn't the hard part - it's the health savings accounts, dependent care accounts, life insurance, dependent life, disability... and then that bottom line number made me a little dizzy. But I have to admit, seeing his name under "dependent" and "beneficiary" did make me smile. :)

Anyway, back to the fun stuff. Our first real cool front is blowing through tonight, so we went for a walk to the park after dinner. We went from shorts and sleeveless top earlier this afternoon to long pants, long sleeves, and even a light jacket for the first time. (OK so it's just barely under 70 degrees but I couldn't resist!) He was in full-on performance mode tonight for his Wednesday night audience. It didn't take him long to fall asleep afterwards though. Demonstrating all your new games, words and skills from the past week is exhausting stuff!

A pretty piece of paper

After the initial foggy thought of whyyy is he up so early today?!? I looked up at the happily bouncing Wei J and noticed there was something different about him this morning. But what could be different from one night to the next morning?

His HAIR! It must have grown that magical last fraction of an inch and is now lying nice and flat on his head! He's still got the baby monkey fuzz in a few spots but for the most part, it looks like there is hope that we'll be able to grow it out after all.

Small victories. :)

Of course, he must have known it was going to be a big day. We got his official Certificate of Citizenship in the mail. He looks so tiny and serious in the photo, taken just one week after we met. Hmmm, and by coincidence I dressed him in red, white and blue today. Now I can get to work on getting him his Social Security card and then after I do the re-adoption process, a U.S. passport in his American name! He's been a citizen since we landed on US soil last month, but seeing it in black and white sure was nice!

I have scrubbed my last bottle!

I almost hate to bump that pumpkin patch cuteness down the page with another post, but since I missed Sunday I thought I'd better see what I can come up with. It gets hard to come up with new things sometimes, especially when the refrain running through my head is usually along the lines of "belly, belly button, you are so fine...belly, belly button I'm so happy you are mine." I can recite a half dozen Dr. Seuss books too but I'll save that for a rainy day.

Wei J played with his new Duplo blocks for the first time today. I thought he would like them since he did pretty well with them at the doctor's office. Sure enough, we spent more than an hour stacking them and breaking them apart. Mostly it was me stacking and him breaking apart, but since he was breaking them and putting them back in the bucket I'm all for encouraging that behavior!

Oh, and more big news for Wei J ... today was his second day without any bottles! He's completely on sippy cups now, and today he didn't even need one for any of his naps! He's also down from the 4 (or more!) bottles of milk a day to just one 8 oz cup in the morning. Between that cup and the milk in his oatmeal and the yogurt snack, he's right about at the amount of milk that his pedi wanted me to wean him to. I wasn't sure it was possible, but here we are. Fortunately he gets such a big kick out of saying "ahhhhh!" after drinking water that the transition was that much easier!

Where was I? Oh yeah. Belly, belly button...

Little Pumpkin at the Patch

Wei J had quite a day today! We headed to a pumpkin patch in a cute little town that feels quiet and quaint but is really just a short drive outside the city. I think most of the families there were wanting photo ops more than pumpkins, and most of the kids seemed to be in tears and not interested in cooperating. Not Wei J, of course! He was hounded by twice the paparazzi but took it all in stride. :) Even with the tricky lighting I think we came away with some good stuff. I haven't had a chance to look through all of them and I'm not positive who to give credit to for some of them, but for today's post I'll share some of my favorites so far.

I'll be the first to admit I did more shopping than I should have during the wait. There were a couple of outfits that stood out for me - when I looked at them hanging, I could almost picture them filled with little arms and legs toddling around the room. They made him tangible for me. They brought hope for that little life to come and gave him depth beyond just a referral photo. These overalls were one of those special outfits and the pumpkin patch was a perfect place to wear them for the first time.




As soon as we talked about going to a pumpkin patch, I knew I wanted this shot and I'm SO happy that my little guy miraculously held still long enough for me to get it!

And as soon as I picked his outfit, I knew I wanted this shot...

Remember a couple of weeks ago I said butterflies are following us? Look who decided to hitch a ride on Wei J's backside.

Ayi snapped this cute one - Wei J would have been happy to sit and play in the straw for hours!

This series is a little blurry, but the pure joy on his face makes me want to cry. I also love the crossed fingers - I don't know what that's about, but he loves doing it.

And just in case you thought we didn't have Game Day on our minds, here's Wei J wishing his fingers were long enough to Hook 'Em. \m/

What a day! Wei J finally decides he is ready to be wheeled home. :)

Another OhMyGosh

So what age do kids start identifying matching colors? Now I wish I'd studied more about developmental milestones during the wait. All along I thought odds were he'd be delayed and would have some catching up to do. Instead, he's far above and beyond at 16 or 17 months and just soaking things up like a sponge. WeiJ has been showing a different interest in his taggie blanket - shown here - lately. He wants to know what each tag color is...over and over and over and over. I've been using the colors to show him where that particular color might be on his clothes or in the room, just trying to plant those seeds in his brain. Today he pointed to the one orange square patch on his shirt, then pointed to his orange shoes. Holy cow!! I never expected that it was actually sinking in already and that he could make those connections on his own initiative!

My little reader has the book right side up!

WeiJ was in another fantastic mood today. Here are a few random notes I can share...

He'd slowed down on the eating for a couple of days, but today it is SO back on! He had a big lunch, then 15 minutes later he was asking for cookies so I gave him a cup of fruit. 15 minutes later he was asking for cereal, so I gave him his snack trap of Cheerios and added some apple fruit puffs to it. I noticed that they are the shape of a star so I showed him and started singing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. He smiled so big! His favorite part is when I get to "up above" ... he chimes in with "upubba!"

Baby's growing up - I put away the 6-12 month clothes and he has officially graduated to size 4 diapers. Banner week! Unfortunately I made the mistake of not opening the new box out of his sight. Rookie mistake - I should know better! So now all he wants to do is pull out diapers, drop them on the floor and announce "dy-da" with each one. Nap time sounds like a good time for Mama to go find a place to conveniently hide a case of 200 diapers.

He's ready for Halloween, running around in his orange jack-o-lantern crocs and toting his Elmo bucket. Mama's not so sure she likes him having shoes he can take off himself, but he sure loves it. Speaking of shoes, I looked back at some old photos (not exactly intentionally - WeiJ just likes to sit here and scroll through the photos on the blog and admire himself) and noticed his old red shoes. It's only been a month and a half...how can shoes already seem that old and so long ago? Could be because he's on his THIRD pair of shoes already! These sandals are big enough to last probably a little while, but sandals and cold weather aren't exactly the best match. Then again... that's only an issue what, maybe 2 or 3 weeks out of the entire "winter"?? This morning was on the cool side (yay!) so he got to wear long pants for a little while. He thought he looked pretty spiffy today. I might just have to agree.

Do they come any cuter than this?

Surely it can't get cuter than this...

Nope. Couldn't possibly be any cuter, bed head and all. :)

Where did my marbles go?

Yet another example of either newmommyitis or purely the result of lack of sleep...who knows. Ever since the last day in China I have had trouble with my vision. I could hardly read any signs in the airports and thought I slept too long with them in...but then the next day they were still bad. I changed out contacts after we got home, thinking a fresh pair would fix the issue. Nope. I couldn't believe my vision changed so dramatically and dreaded hearing the news from the eye doctor, but figured I should suck it up and go get it over with. Then today, I had my right lens in and was putting in the left when I almost dropped it. Lucky for me I caught it - and even luckier still, I happened to notice a little notch on the lens. As in the notch that shows it's the one that fits my right eye. Good grief. I've been wearing them backwards for a month.

Anyway, I know you don't visit to hear about me. :)

Wei J was in a fantastic mood today, a very welcome change from yesterday. When I brushed his teeth this morning, I noticed a new tooth breaking through. Guess I can't blame him for being cranky! He was in a silly mood and sooo loveydovey. He fought the second nap though, so I decided to let him skip the nap so we'd hopefully be in bed before midnight tonight for a change. This was a good day to skip a nap too - he loves Wednesday evenings with his Ayi and ShuShu! He was so excited to show off all of his new words and skills. Pretend play is a new entertaining twist. He fed Ayi pretend cereal out of his tupperware bowl and made smacking noises for her to eat it. After dinner, he was crawling around under the table with his tongue out, pretending to be a dog. I just did a quick search on the developmental timing of pretend play, and it looks like that's about a 2 year old skill. See, I'm not just biased. :) We went shopping after dinner to see if I could find a costume for WeiJ before we're stuck sorting through remnants. No dice, but it wore him out so much that he fell asleep on the 3 minute ride home and went straight to bed without a fuss. It's an hour later and I still feel like doing a happy dance! Walking through the parking lot, the temperature was finally feeling like Fall and a nice breeze was bringing just the right kind of chill. I looked over at WeiJ catching a ride in ShuShu's arms -- kiddo had his head back, eyes closed, and smiling at the breeze in his hair. I love watching him savor moments like that.

I had a chance to get behind the camera tonight - the good camera, not my weenie little point 'n shoot. The lighting is giving me fits but I'll get it figured out. Here are a few of my favorites from today. You'll just have to wait for the rest on WeiJ's 17th Month slideshow!

My musical little maestro

Playing piano with Grandpa

Little snuggler found a comfy spot

Yeah, I think ShuShu kinda likes him :)